Reflections

Joel and I were blessed to be able to attend the Weekend to Remember marriage conference this past weekend. It was so. so. good! We didn't get to stay overnight at the hotel where the 3-day conference took place because our daughter is a nursing 9-month old, and I didn't know how nights at my parents' would go...instead, we drove back and forth from my parents' house, to the conference (which was an hour each way!) I'm so very thankful that my Dad & Mom watched the kids for us. They're the best! The conference was well worth the miles we put on (and the complete exhaustion!) ;)

We both learned a ton. One speaker at the conference pointed out that for most things we do, we have to get licensed...or certified. There's driver's ed, and a test you have to take before you get to drive on your own. With marriage, you say, "I do...I do"...and bam! You're on your own. Ha! Usually no one really teaches you how to be a husband or wife. I realized there is a LOT that I don't know about being a good wife. The Bible if full of rich truths to lead us, and has much to say about the "roles" of marriage. This conference was 3 days of being immersed in what the Bible has to say about marriage and hearing first-hand accounts from people who have walked the walk. Real people. Married people that fight. And make up. And lead productive lives. The speakers we heard are a positive example to their children as to what marriage should be.

By Sunday, I was feeling overwhelmed. I admit I was afraid to fail at all the wonderful truths I learned...and for that reason, I'm thankful the final speaker of the day challenged us to pick TWO THINGS to begin working on this week. Just two. He said not to expect a new husband/wife by Monday, haha! I think he was saying that to me. ;)

Two of the things I want to work on are:
1.) Realize that Joel and I are ONE and not to continually be on the defense. One point in our take home book, is that "Oneness in marriage is only possible when we consider our spouse before we consider ourselves." I love that! I don't need to always be defensive when Joel makes a comment to me because (usually!) he is not saying something to try and hurt me. On most of the surveys we filled out, he and I were complete opposites, so if we misunderstand each other...there is a reason! I guess opposites really do attract. :)

2.) I want to submit to Joel on decisions, realizing that he is the ultimate authority in our home. On Sunday, the guys and ladies were split up...and in the ladies' session, we learned about the Biblical definition of submission. Submission is NOT just doing everything your husband says and it is definitely NOT allowing yourself to be part of an abusive relationship, because you are wanting to just "submit". Submission IS respectfully following your husband to make the FINAL decision. This doesn't mean that I can't tell Joel how I feel about things, of course...but it does mean that I need to ultimately trust that he will make the right decision. And...if he doesn't, it means that we'll be wrong-together! ;)

Because it's hard for me to post without adding a photo, here's a pic of the kids and I from yesterday. :)